Author Archives: John Wallenfeldt

Michigan defense contractor has God in its sights – Yahoo! News

The Talibangelicals are really going out of their way to get our troops killed in some Bizarro World 21st Century Crusades.

Trijicom, a defense contractor who makes night vision gear for the Marines, is likely in violation of federal law for inserting bible verses into their serial numbers.

I mean, yeah, my In-and-Out cups and fry boats have verses on them, but we aren’t importing Double-Doubles to feed Muslims in Iraq and Afghanistan. Nor are we buying them with federal monies.

The gall of these Talibangelicals to create a situation that just feeds into the al-Qaeda/Taliban message that we are out to convert those we are purportedly protecting would be pathetic if it wasn’t so dangerous. They really probably think they are doing God’s work. Why placing the Christian God’s words on a weapon meant to kill supposed Muslims is supposed to make other people want to give up Islam is beyond me.

Then again, most things Talibangelicals think are good idea just make my skin crawl.

FiveThirtyEight: Politics Done Right: Divorce Rates Higher in States with Gay Marriage Bans

I already knew this but didn’t have the data to prove it, but the so-called “traditional marriage” states are full of degenerates divorcing each other at far greater percentages than the rest of the country.

So, let’s be honest, who is a greater threat to the institution of marriage: gay people who have been in relationships for decades who would like to get married and can’t OR rednecks who knock each other up and get hitched and learn to hate each other but do it because they are told they have to?

I think you already know the answer.

And I’m pretty sure the divorce map hews closely to the bottom map. Yes, it is a bit out of date since New Jersey went all Talibangelical and did not allow gay marriage like people thought. Granted, it isn’t pertinent to divorce necessarily, but if you are bigoted enough to fear gay marriage, why are you cool with first cousins procreating?

Letter of the day: Haiti suffers, and Robertson sees the hand of Satan | StarTribune.com

Satan responds to Pat Robertson. Hilarity ensues.

Dear Pat Robertson,

I know that you know that all press is good press, so I appreciate the shout-out. And you make God look like a big mean bully who kicks people when they are down, so I’m all over that action. But when you say that Haiti has made a pact with me, it is totally humiliating. I may be evil incarnate, but I’m no welcher. The way you put it, making a deal with me leaves folks desperate and impoverished. Sure, in the afterlife, but when I strike bargains with people, they first get something here on earth — glamour, beauty, talent, wealth, fame, glory, a golden fiddle. Those Haitians have nothing, and I mean nothing. And that was before the earthquake. Haven’t you seen “Crossroads”? Or “Damn Yankees”? If I had a thing going with Haiti, there’d be lots of banks, skyscrapers, SUVs, exclusive night clubs, Botox — that kind of thing. An 80 percent poverty rate is so not my style. Nothing against it — I’m just saying: Not how I roll. You’re doing great work, Pat, and I don’t want to clip your wings — just, come on, you’re making me look bad. And not the good kind of bad. Keep blaming God. That’s working. But leave me out of it, please. Or we may need to renegotiate your own contract.

Best, Satan