Muslim fanatics crave Dix

Okay, that was a horrible pun, but seeing as six fundamentalist idiots plotted to kill as many soldiers at Fort Dix before getting caught, I plan on insulting them without care.

Meanwhile in Louisiana, our compassionate conservatives have been teaching their children well as one of them planned to assassinate Hillary Clinton. Look, while not a fan of her's, can we at least deal with this at the ballot box?